Born For This
by ForestOfGreed
Summary: Touya Akira is the prodigious child of Touya Meijin, but also holds a long-kept secret. Shindo Hikaru is the spiritual vessel of Fujiwaru no Sai, and is the victim of many tragedies. They both go through a journey that will change them greatly... Non-yaoi
1. I Shindo Hikaru

**S****UMMARY**: Touya Akira is the prodigious child of Touya Meijin aka. Touya Koyo. This child loves Go more than anything else. Shindo Hikaru is the spiritual vessel of Fujiwara no Sai, and has been since he was 10. This orphan child enters the Go world, determined to take care of his younger brother, and meets Akira on the way. But, the Touya family has been hiding something for all these years…

**DISCLAIMER:**I don't own Hikaru no Go.

**C****HAPTER ****O****NE – **_S__HINDO __H__IKARU_

He breathed in the crisp, fresh morning air. His eyes grazed his surroundings as he stared at the little town with a fond expression.

_So this is the last time I'll look at these houses._

It was somewhat sad in a certain retrospect. He was leaving this small, homely place he grew up in. This was where he would play with the neighborhood kids, where he would talk with his grandfather, where he would discuss Go with some of the more elderly residents. But it was also, at least he thought, where the most important event in his life had occurred.

Sai appeared to him. Even though he was taken in by the neighbors, close friends of his grandfather, it was Sai who acted as a guardian. He would remind Hikaru when he had homework due the next day. He would navigate the sleep-deprived child through the day when he had stayed up all night studying Go. It was Sai who comforted him when his grandfather died, and it was the same Sai who forced Hikaru to face reality when his parents had perished in a plane crash, leaving the young Takagi in the care of the older brother whom he had never known.

_Hikaruuuu! I want to play Go!_

Of course, it was also Sai who annoyed Hikaru to no end when he wanted to play Go.

"I don't want to! I'm going to try and be normal for once!" Sai started sobbing as he thought of the prospect of _not_ playing Go. And of course, his despair seeped through the emotional link they shared and caused Hikaru to feel ill. "Fine, fine, I'll take you to a Go salon over there once we're settled! But I'm not playing!"

Immediately, he started regretting his decision. Even if he didn't want to, the spirit would beg and plead until Hikaru agreed to let him play. And of course, after one game, Sai would continue to bother the young boy for another game…and another and another until Hikaru was too tired to even pick up the stones.

Despite the obvious futility of the prospect, Hikaru was determined to be a normal 12 year old kid. To Hikaru, that meant not playing Go, and keeping the fact that he even _knew_ how to play Go secret. But Sai knew better. He knew how hard the real world could and would be. Hikaru had to take care of Takagi. They didn't know who their guardian would be, but it was supposed to be an old acquaintance of their father. It was likely it would be hard for him to support them.

And so the job of taking care of Takagi and himself fell to Hikaru. But it was only Sai who knew this. Hikaru was still blissfully oblivious of this fact. Sai knew he would have to face the truth sooner or later, but he wanted Hikaru to at least enjoy the blessing and ignorance that only exists in childhood. At the least, he could have a family…of sorts.

"Hikaru! The car is here!" Akagi-san, the one who had taken Hikaru in along with her other two children, called from inside the house.

"Coming!" He took one last look at the grave of his grandfather before heading toward the place where he would be taken away from his memories.

_Goodbye…Ojii-san…_

"Are you Shindo Hikaru?" A man who Hikaru assumed was the driver, bowed slightly to him. Hikaru reciprocated. "Unfortunately, your planned guardian has passed away from a heart attack. We found this letter addressed to you with him." The driver handed him the letter. On the envelope was his name in neat, crisp handwriting.

To Shindo Hikaru,

I suspect my time in this world is coming to an end. If you have received this letter, it means I didn't have a chance to get to know you. I am sad to say I cannot do much for you now, but know that I truly cared for you. I remember when you were just a baby, at a time I'm sure you don't remember. I may not have fulfilled my role as your godfather, but I hope someone else does. The man who will be you and your brother's guardian may not be able to take care of you 24/7, so I hope you will do your best to lessen the burden. I wish you well.

Farewell,

Nishijima Shishio

Hikaru was dumbfounded. This man, whom he had never known, whose name he had just discovered, had cared for him so much? And yet now he was gone, just like everyone else in Hikaru's life.

"Excuse me, who is my new guardian?" Hikaru politely inquired of the driver.

"I do not know of the details, just that he was a kouhai of Nishijima-san in high school," he replied as he opened the car door, motioning for Hikaru to get in. After a quick farewell and a few tears from the young Akagi children, Hikaru, along with Sai, sped off, away from his hometown, away from his grandfather…away from his past.

But the farther away he was from all that, the closer he was to a new life, a new environment, a new family, and, though he had yet to know, a new friend.

_Takagi…I'm finally meeting him…my brother…

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_

**A/N: **I know, I'm supposed to be working on my other stories, but I've recently reread most of them, and my decision is...to remove/rewrite all of them. I realized how childish my writing sounded, and I tried to fix it here, but I don't know if I'm successful or not. I can tell you for sure that my _Bleach_ story, _False Reality_ (if any of you are fans of it), will definitely be rewritten. Though, I don't think it'll be soon, as my muses for the _Bleach_ fandom have banged their heads on a table and have lost most of their originality. Maybe in a few months it'll happen. I think that otherwise, the other stories aren't worth keeping. _Illya_ and _Gathering of the Times_ might be rewritten, but they're definitely coming down if not. Everything else goes.

I don't put my stories up for adoption, nor do I keep them up if they're abandoned.

**I hope you enjoy "Born For This"!**


	2. II Touya Akira

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Hikaru no Go

**CHAPTER ****TWO – **_TOUYA __AKIRA_

The teacher droned on and on about knowledge I knew I had no use for. I would be quitting after graduating middle school anyways. That was the sensible choice. Go was my life. But, then if Go was my life, then my life was awfully dull. Boring, with no goal in life… that was Go to me. I had no opponent. At least, none that could match my caliber. There was no one to call my rival. All the professionals Otou-san invited over were definitely better than my playing of the game, but I've always known that. Every game we play, every defeat at their hands… they don't matter to me.

Was there no one who could save me from this boredom? Would I never feel the sense of having a purpose? Just beating the opponent in front of me… it's not enough. It's such a short, meaningless goal. I longed for someone I could constantly play and not know who would win and who would lose. Someone who would satisfy this need for competition… Would I ever find him? Is there someone like that out there?

The bell rang, and I forced myself to grab my bag and walk to the outside of the school, where a car was waiting. I entered the car, schoolmates staring and pointing at the luxurious vehicle.

_Right... they don't usually see these types of cars on their normal days… I must remind Otou-san to send a cheaper one…_

My thoughts were absentminded, and my mind was somewhere away from me, but I dimly registered that most of the students here didn't know who my father was. He was just another name in everyday life. It was so different from the Go world, and I found a small comfort in the fact. But of course, I was the same. Though the fame my name held was considerably less, it was fame nonetheless. But it wasn't mine. It was my father's. It was my fate, not my right, as Touya Meijin's only child. Would I ever escape that destiny? Would I ever escape those chains that hold me down to my family?

Life… is it usually filled with questions like mine? Or am I just special? Special… they always told me that when my lack of close friends at school was revealed to my family and Go pros. But I knew the truth. I wasn't _special_. I was _abnormal_. I didn't belong at school, near kids my age who had a normal life, one not filled with a board game. I loved the game, sure… but the trouble it gave me… sometimes, I felt it wasn't worth it.

But I didn't fit into the Go world either. I had enough skill, but I wasn't an insei, nor was I a pro. In most aspects of the word, I was an amateur. And in any pro universe, amateurs didn't have a chance. Those suicidal you hear about – they were lucky. No, I don't want to die, but the feeling that you have nothing to live for and the feeling of so much freedom that you can just die without anything holding you back… they were something I would never have.

"Where are we going?" I asked the driver quietly. There was no reason for Otou-san to send a car except for some important event which required my attendance.

"Social gathering; your mother requested your presence."

_Oh? So it was Okaa-san who sent the car?_

"She also told me to inform you that your father will be taking in two boys. Their guardian was an old schoolmate of him before he died."

"I see…"

_… Wait, what?_

My mind having finally registered what he had said, I quickly and calmly, of course, dialed my mother's cell phone. I suppose I should have tried to gather myself before talking to her.

"What are you thinking!?" Perhaps I wasn't as calm as I thought. "How can we take in two strange kids? I thought we were trying to…" I restrained myself from continuing. Taking a deep breath, I tried to look at the situation from an unbiased point of view. On one hand, two kids I didn't know would enter my home and possibly discover my secret. On the other, they might not find out at all, and I have nothing to worry about. Unfortunately, I would have to befriend or kick them out in either situation. And of course, neither was a skill I excelled at.

The car slowed to a stop at a large… house? I wasn't really sure what it was, but it was certainly big. My mother was outside, socializing with others. I had absolutely no idea where my father could be, but if this place had a Go board…

I stepped out, but no one noticed me. It was certainly a refreshing feeling, to be near high class people and not be immediately recognized as "Touya Meijin's son".

But I still didn't want to be there. I absolutely detested social parties, though I was forced to endure them. Why my mother insisted on my presence, I would never know. But today, I was just too tired to deal with the annoying, and idle, people. They would only make me collapse by the time the party was over. Fortunately, I always prepared for these situations, and everything I needed was in my schoolbag. I hid in a small corner and quickly changed into more comfortable clothes, more suited for someone like me.

Nobody had noticed me yet, so I quickly ran away, making sure not to forget anything. After traveling a few blocks, I reached my destination: my father's Go salon. It was always relaxing to play a game of Shidougo with the people there, though some of them worshipped me a little too much. I wasn't here for that reason today. I highly doubted anyone would realize who I was anyway.

I entered the quiet little salon to see Harumi behind the counter. She noticed me immediately and started slightly in surprise.

"Oh! Are you here to play? The fee is 500 yen." I smiled amiably and paid her, not really minding where my money went; it was probably part of her salary. I found an empty board and started to recreate a game almost automatically. My mind was somewhere else, thinking about how to deal with the recently revealed situation that my parents suddenly created.

_How am I going to keep the truth hidden? I could ban them from my room… no, that's too childish. Besides, they would think me odd._

"Excuse me?" A voice on my right addressed me. "That's an interesting game you've recreated." I turned toward the source to see a boy about my age looking intensely at the Go board. Not aware what game I had drawn out of my mind, I took a quick look at where my hands were. I immediately recognized both the move and the match.

"Ah, this is a game I played online. I was black. It ended early though, because apparently my opponent had something come up before we could finish. We were pretty evenly matched though," I remarked to the boy. He nodded absently before moving his hand to a spot on the board.

"But if you had played your hand here, wouldn't the move force your opponent to defend that group?" I looked at the point. It was certainly a good hand, but easy to counter. I shook my head and moved my own hand to another point.

"Then he could have countered here, leaving me open for attack. I would have been in serious trouble at that point." The boy frowned before pointing to various spots on the board.

"If you protected this group here, it _would_ still leave you open, but the opponent also has no choice but to place his stone there. From then on, you could set a trap to force your opponent to move where you want him to." An interesting idea. Unconsciously, I had started to place white stones at where I would have gone had I been my opponent, and the boy started putting down black while still explaining his moves, as if he were me. Soon, it had turned into a sort of game. One of us would play a hand and explain why we put it there, while the other would listen carefully and before placing a stone, also explaining the move. I don't know what had happened… but I felt that for the first time, I wasn't burdened by Go.

Before either of us had realized it, we had played out the whole game. Almost instinctively, we arranged our stones into squares and counted our territory.

"Hm… white wins with a 3 moku difference," I noted. The boy glance at the clock hanging on the wall, as did I.

"Oh, I should be leaving!" I exclaimed as I realized the party would almost be over by now. I shot out of my chair, and then turned my head back to the boy, who was getting up to leave as well. "By the way, what's your name?" I bit my lip as soon as the words left my mouth. Immediately, I regretted asking the question, for the boy would expect me to reciprocate if he answered.

"Shindo Hikaru. And yours?"

_What should I say? He doesn't seem very knowledgeable about the Go world… but what if he finds out later?_

"Suzuki Amaya," I lied fluidly, using the reversed family name of an old classmate. Before the conversation could be continued, I sped out of the salon and ran the whole distance to the party. I arrived at the front gate, panting. Changing in a mostly hidden space behind a large bush, I slung my schoolbag across my shoulder and entered the party. Contrary to my thoughts, the gathering was far from over.

"… And here, Touya-sensei has played a beautiful hand, totally cutting off his opponent's attack!"

_So this is just an event to showcase Otou-san's skills… of course._

"Akira!" My mother exclaimed as she caught sight of me. "Where have you been?" I felt rather uncomfortable, and wasn't exactly inclined to answer her question. I mumble an incoherent answer and made an excuse about fresh air. I darted out to the empty veranda.

_I should have come here later… Hm? What's that little boy doing here?_

A young boy, looking to be no older than 5, sat against a wall, crying. Looking around to see if anyone was around, I headed toward him.

"Are you lost?" I asked him in a soft voice, though the answer was obvious. He looked up at me with puffy red eyes and sniffled. My natural instinct was to hug him, but I resisted the urge.

"Onii-chan told me to meet him if I ever got lost…" he mumbled, obviously scared. My guess was that he had misinterpreted any directions his brother had given him.

"Where were you supposed to meet him?"

_Maybe it's near here…_

His face scrunched up in such a manner it looked almost as if it hurt for him to try to remember. Though I don't think I've experienced the sensation before…

"A park," he answered.

_Well, if that's all he can remember… let's see… there _is_ a park about half a block from here…_

"How about I take you there?" I offered after some thought. The boy wouldn't be able to navigate himself there, based on the fact that he ended up lost in the first place. As we were walking, he chattered away as if he had no care in the world, telling me about his brother. Apparently, their parents had died in a plane accident. He had been under the care of the neighbors, and his brother had been living with their grandfather's friend. But from the information he gave me, it seemed that he had only known his older brother recently, though it was obvious he adored him.

_Hm? Oh, the lights are broken here…_

The young boy immediately balked and stood stone still. Realizing the child was afraid, I slowly coerced him to at least come to where I was. Eventually, he started walking at a snail's pace next to me, looking around fearfully. I was patient, and matched his small steps, talking to him to try and distract him. It wasn't very effective, though, and when a dog barked, he jumped in fear and surprise and grabbed my hand. However, with this action, he seemed to calm down greatly.

_It must be the fact that it's proof I'm here…_

We finally entered a street where the lamps were fully lit, and he let go of my hand. I spotted the park not too far, about a minute walk.

"Onii-chan!" the boy exclaimed. I could see a figure waiting in the park. The boy ran, and then seemed to remember his manners and turned around to face me.

"Thank you for bringing me here, Onee-chan!" I froze in surprise. He waved and ran toward his brother. I stared at the spot where he had been standing, amazed. He had seen through my disguise.

_I guess you really can't fool a child…_

_

* * *

_

**A/N: I want to make this clear. This is by _absolutely no means_ a romance. I might be planning some later on, but it is certainly _not_ a main theme here. Any romance in this story will be minimal. Though, I'm probably gonna sneak a hint into the story once in a while...**


	3. III Emergency

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hikaru no Go, Bleach or its "Swing Back the Pendulum" arc, a two-ton boulder, nor the original idea of Teriyaki Beef.**

**C****HAPTER ****T****HREE – **_**E**__**MERGENCY  
**_

_Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock._

I sighed impatiently. The occupants of the room were only uncomfortable because they caused this awkward air in the first place! Still, I certainly wasn't unoccupied.

_Hikaru, look at the Go boards! This man, or someone in his family must play Go! Can we please ask them to play? Please, please…_

Really, could he not be quiet for a minute? All the time, everyday, it's about Go, me playing Go, Internet Go, and of course, Sai playing Go. Now, the obvious choice at this point would be to ignore the ghost. And I tried that. But it failed due the emotional link we shared. My stomach felt ill, and my throat became dry. So really, there was no way to escape the blathering "Go genius", or so he says.

_Can't you shut up for a bit? Didn't I already take you to that Go salon? We even met a girl who played Go there._

He seemed to ponder that fact for a moment before answering.

_Yes… she did play Go… very skilled as well. In any way, it just goes to show you need to work harder at Go! There's someone your age that plays so magnificently! Of course, her skills are inferior to mine…_

I wasn't paying attention anymore, and directed my attention to the boy who was sitting across from me. Rather obvious to anyone who looked at him, Touya Akira's mind was elsewhere, most likely somewhere in the Go mindscape. I had heard his fame in the Go world was quite a substantial amount, though he had yet to become a professional.

_How monotonous that must be_.

Who wants to live a life like that? There was no excitement, no challenge. I was sure he was met with no match – at least from someone his own age – in the Go world. Not that I was particularly concerned. In fact, I didn't really give a damn toward the boy. He shared the same age as I did, but he had an enormously different mindset, at least from my point of view. When I had talked with him earlier, he seemed much closed off, as if he thought if he openly talked with anyone, he would despair to no end.

_Such a disagreeable person._

He seemed the type of person that didn't have many friends.

_No friends at all._

I wondered what he was like in public.

_Fake; different._

The situation seemed familiar, though certainly not fond.

_How similar is it to mine?_

I couldn't have been like that; our backgrounds were completely different.

_What about my attitude?_

No. I refused to think like that. Forcing the depressing thoughts out of my head, I tried to listen to the cheerful conversation Takagi was having with our caretaker, who apparently also happened to be a world-renowned Go pro, Touya Meijin.

"… I'm not really clear on what my hobbies are, though Onii-chan recently showed me a new board game." I smiled softly when he mentioned how I had taught him the basics of Go the other night. Amazingly, he easily overcame the mental barrier Go presented to most people and worked on Go problems for the remainder of the night. In the morning, I woke to find him collapsed in front of the goban.

"Really?" Touya-san said in an amused tone. Takagi nodded furiously.

"It was really fun!" he exclaimed with a wide grin. "I think Onii-chan called it…" His face contorted in concentration. "Go." Touya-san's face registered obvious surprise; most likely from the fact I knew how to play. Soon, though, his expression transformed to a warm smile.

"Is that so? Well, then, you can play anytime on one of the gobans here."

_Yay! I wonder if that offer is extended to you, Hikaru! It must be, it has to be! Oh, can we please play sometime, Hikaru?_

I winced at the sudden outburst and silently agreed to calm the spirit. Touya Akira noticed my sudden movement and narrowed his eyes at me. I just stared back, hoping he would break the awkward contact. My wish was granted when he directed his attention toward his father.

"Otou-san, may I take my leave?" He spoke so formally at the time. I would later learn the reason behind his way of speaking. Touya-san nodded his consent before his son dashed away, retreating to his room. Throughout the rest of dinner, I stayed silent.

I confined myself to my room (Takagi slept in the bedroom next to me) and set up the goban, preparing myself for my daily game against Sai.

"Onegaishimasu," I said, bowing my head. Sai did the same. I was white, he was black. He placed the first stone. As we got farther and farther into the game, I noticed a significant difference in his usual playing style. Thinking he was just testing me, I adapted to the new style of play, which, unexpectedly, changed again, this time to a less controlled, more robotic, type of play. Confused, I continued to try and counter the strange moves. Oddly, when I played a hand rather easy to counter, he totally ignored it and instead made a mistake. I immediately knew something was wrong. What it was, though, I had no idea. I looked up at his slightly transparent form. He was clearly deep in thought, though not about our game.

It was too late when I registered the dull pain in the back of my head. Before, when I had first met him, I would have tried to yell at Sai, hit him (though he was incorporeal), or somehow get his attention. Now I knew it was futile. I could only prepare for the pain I knew was coming. I heard a light knock on my door.

"Onii-chan!"

_Not now! Why did he have to come _now_ of all times?_

The door opened to reveal a tired Takagi, dressed and ready for bed.

"Onii-chan, I came to say goodnight…" I smiled lightly at him, trying to hide the discomfort I was feeling. I motioned for him to come over. I gave him a hug, and quietly told him to go to bed. I could feel the attack imminent.

"See you in the morning, Onii-chan…" I didn't hear the rest of his sentence. A deluge of suffering poured over my head, and I grit my teeth, trying to persevere.

My head was splitting; it felt as if a two-ton boulder crushed my skull, and then a four year old stapled the pieces together. Soon, the pain worsened, and a groan escaped from my mouth. I fell backwards, holding my head as if it was my lifeline.

_What in the world is Sai thinking about?_

Unfortunately for me, our mental link had grown over the past two years. Thus, whenever Sai contemplated ideas I couldn't understand, some sort of headache would occur. Usually, I would also pass out. I dimly heard Takagi call out in surprise and Touya-san tell his son something before the pain intensified to the point where I lost consciousness. My last thought was, _Sai, you are so in trouble_.

* * *

**A/N: Another update! I'm on a roll!**

**So, a complication has risen! Hikaru's headaches will be explained more in-depth during the "Negative Chapters" (chapters dedicated to the past of certain characters - think Bleach "Swing Back the Pendulum" arc) and later in the story, so I hope you'll be satisfied with the short explanation I've given here.**

**Akira and his father have discovered one of Hikaru's secrets! What questions will they have when he wakes up? When will Hikaru realize who Akira _really_ is? Will he ever? What about school? Does Teriyaki Beef fall from the sky?**

**Find out most of that and more in this story! Keep reading, and continue to enjoy "Born For This"!  
**


	4. IV Hide

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hikaru no Go.**

**A/N: Just in case I receive complaints about Akira's character… Yes; she is an angst-ridden character. Both Hikaru and Akira should be OOC. Unlike some people, I don't believe that changing someone's past will leave their character unaffected. This chapter is a little different. There's practically no description. It's pretty much written like an angst oneshot. There's a huge change of pace in the middle of it. That is intended. Just to warn you guys, I'll be focusing on Akira for the time being. For now, she has a more complex character than Hikaru. But don't worry Hikaru fans! You'd be surprised how much angst music can inspire me. About half of this chapter was inspired by one song. Besides, there are still the Negative Chapters to look forward to!

* * *

**

**C****HAPTER ****F****OUR – **_**H**__**IDE**_

_This isn't good._

I received multiple stares as I walked through the halls of my school.

_Did this _have_ to get out _now_?_

A few girls approached me and asked for his number.

_How in the world would _I_ know?_

Instead, I just politely refused their request, saying I had a matter to attend to.

"Touya-san!" His voice called my name. _His_ voice… I really didn't want to talk to him now.

"What is it?" And yet I still responded. Perhaps I knew my non-existent popularity would go even further down if I ignored him, or maybe it was just common courtesy. But I responded.

"Can you get me some water?" Of course, after his fainting episode, I had to dote upon his every need. When we were at school, no matter how much I tried to hide my connection to him, it was known by the whole school by lunch. Even worse, the airhead, yet popular, girls at my school proclaimed that Hikaru's looks overruled any other's in the area. Thus, not only did he not have to do anything, but the selfish bastard even got _used_ to being given everything he needed.

And so, with this new request on top of numerous others, I snapped.

"Go get is yourself, you shit-ass bastard." I didn't make a scene like many would when they finally lost their temper, but I certainly put all my malice into my words. I brushed past him, ignoring his presence. However, I quickly discovered Shindo Hikaru was not an easy person to get rid of. He tried pushing through the crowd, and matched my pace. It wasn't particularly hard, I realized. Since it was obvious I definitely couldn't run very quickly in my attire.

"Touya-san! Wait, Touya-san!" He was held up by the constant stream of schoolmates, obviously trying to appeal to him.

_Good_.

Immediately, I felt guilty. I had never known the sensation of popularity, so I couldn't really understand the feeling of having to try to push through the throng of students that gathered.

_But this is just ridiculous!_

Finally, we reached an open area. Unfortunately for me, I found nowhere to run (or speed walk). Not wanting to appear to be a lost lamb to the school, I turned to confront who I now deemed an enemy.

"Touya-san, can we please talk this out?"

_Stop making this situation seem like a cliché romance._

"I'm really sorry for asking you to do all this."

_I'm sure you are._

"It's just that it _is_ a little hard to get a drink of water without a few students following me."

_So?_

"Erm… well, maybe we could just start over and try to be friends?" I saw a camera flash out of the corner of my eye.

_They better not spread another rumor._

"I believe it'd be best not to be in contact more than we have to be." I said, unfeeling as I strode past his shocked figure. Once I escaped the confines of the hallways and classrooms, I ran. I ran around the track until my legs became sore. And then I jumped over the fence barricading us from the outside world. All schools were the same. They didn't _let_ you escape reality. They _forced_ you to. I didn't want to escape. I wanted the harsh, cold bitterness that was the real world. I wanted the pain. I _needed_ it. I needed to know I was alive. I needed to know who I was.

I received no results. No answers, no merciless, crushing defeat at the hands of someone far superior to me. Perhaps that's why I played Go so much. No one felt _pity_ for their opponent. They delivered you blow after blow, until you had nothing left, until you were left on the ground, soaked in your own blood.

I relished the taste of it on my tongue.

No matter how much my thoughts resembled those of one, I knew I wasn't a masochist. I knew there was a logical explanation. I knew the exact details of it. And I forced myself to bury it deep within my mind.

My legs felt numb. I was the target of even more stares.

_I can't stay here. I need to get away. I need to…_

Still, I kept running. My breaths became short, heavy. My throat… I couldn't even feel it anymore. I felt no pain. I kept moving my legs at a steady pace. One, two, one, two. Right, left, right, left. White, black, white, black.

Grey.

I finally stopped and took a look at my surroundings. A worn-out slide, squeaky bars, a lightly colored swing… there was no doubt.

_This is…_

_"Akira-Nii-chan!"_

_"Did you fall off the swing, Amaya?"_

_"Amaya, don't run so fast. I can't keep up."_

_"You're so athletic compared to me, Amaya!"_

_"Akira-Nii-chan!"_

"Touya-san? Touya-san!" I was snapped from my stupor by a much too familiar voice. However, I refused to respond. I was distracted by the trails of liquid on my cheeks. My vision was becoming blurry. I held up a hand to them and wiped my eye.

"Tears?" I muttered, almost incomprehensibly.

_I'm crying?_

"Touya-san, are you alright?" I shook my head, not completely registering what I was doing or what I was saying. My whole body felt numb; it was as if I had lost all feeling. But the tears continued to pour out.

_Why am I crying?_

"Shindo… why are you here?" My voice was still stifled. I couldn't talk with my usual briskness and clearness. I had no idea what Shindo was doing, but had guessed he sat beside me on the park bench.

_I haven't cried like this before._

"I was searching for you. You're parents are worried. You've been out here for a few hours after school."

_That long?_

"What are you doing way out here?"

"I don't know…"

_Is that my voice?_

Silence ensued. I was perfectly fine with the noiseless atmosphere. But perhaps it was because I wasn't fully conscious; for Hikaru soon decided it was too awkward and suggested we call my parents to tell them he found me.

"No. I don't want to go. I don't want to leave!"

_Why am I so frantic?_

"I can't go! I need to stay!" My voice elevated to a scream, and I could faintly hear Hikaru trying to placate me. I kneeled on the ground, unaware of my surroundings.

"Touya-san, calm down!" Hikaru grabbed my shoulders, slightly shaking me back to reality. "You can stay here, okay?"

_No, that's not true._

"You don't have to go back."

_That's not true; I eventually will._

"You can stay here as long as you like."

_Why are you lying to me?_

I nodded and drowsily laid my head on his lap.

"There, now, just close your eyes and relax."

_This isn't like you._

"Do you feel better?" I nodded robotically.

_But even if you're lying to me…_

"You'll be fine."

_Thank you._

He gently lowered his warm hand onto my head as I closed my eyes. I could hear his rhythmic breathing, and it lead me deeper and deeper into sleep. Haah…

Haah…

Haah…

One…

Two…

One…

Two…

White…

Black…

White…

Black…

Grey.

_This isn't good.

* * *

_

**A/N: Yeah...this story is getting farther and farther away from the original... Ah well, I think a good, dramatic story should be added to every category anyways. It gives a nice change of pace.**

**So now a slightly psychotic Akira is introduced! I've revealed quite a few details about Akira's predicament in this chapter, and will be doing so throughout the story until the Negative Chapters. If you can guess the story so far (In this chapter, you must deduct what Akira's broken flashback reveals), I'll be giving the first one to guess correctly a quote from the Negative Chapters that also pertains to Akira's past. In this way, it's sort of like the Project Runway system. You win: you get an advantage the next round.**

**About Hikaru's behavior, just remember that they're not the only two in the park...  
**


	5. V Where the Lines Overlap

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hikaru no Go.**

**A/N: Look, I don't mind if you criticize my writing. However, please do not assume I do not proofread or have someone else look over my chapters. For those that have trouble understanding, I apologize, but I cannot find someone with the exact same level of comprehension as you. Whether it is too high or too low, please try to understand and read the author's notes.**

**Notes: There will probably be a time skip in after this chapter or the next. Really, there actually might be more than one. These past chapters have pretty much been the exposition, and I need to start writing the rising action, to be frank. I may write one or two more chapters elaborating on how the rivalry is started, but I haven't read this series in a while. Don't expect too many familiar characters.**

**Final Decision on the topic of romance: I've decided that if I'm going to get a definite pairing, it's gonna be in a sequel. And there might not be a sequel. Frankly, I would rather it stay a **_**close**_** friendship, if only because I can't stand writing something (that not romance) when there's a romantic relationship involved.**

**C****HAPTER ****F****IVE – **_**W**__**HERE **__**T**__**HE **__**L**__**INES **__**O**__**VERLAP**_

At first glance, the Touya household might look comfortable, peaceful even. Then, a fidget. Tapping of the fingers. Deep and heavy breathing. Eyes darting back and forth. No, in fact, none of us there felt any comfort or peace in that atmosphere. It wasn't some Zen garden or Buddhist temple. This was a place where you did battle, fought until your final breath.

This was a warzone.

"Touya-san, we feel your daughter has some emotional troubles. I wish to put this simply. She plainly ran away from the school, over a kilometer away. Are her living conditions suitable?" The teacher asked this in a clear, crisp voice. I had to respect her for her courage to speak to my father so bluntly. Then again, I did the same to multiple other figures when I was younger.

_On the other hand, at least I had good enough reason to._

I adjusted the position in which I was sitting slightly; just ever so slightly to the smallest degree that no one should have noticed. That is, _should have_. Of course, of all people, Shindo Hikaru had to notice. I should have expected such, though; he had demonstrated his sharp eye multiple times since his introduction.

"Fujimura-sensei, Touya-san, if I may request, am I permitted take my leave for a walk around the garden?" My jaw almost dropped. _Almost_. Years of training had prepared me for such reactions. The one thing I wanted most to do – leave – was done so easily by Shindo.

"Ah, may Akira-chan accompany me as well?" I sent him a confused look as they nodded.

_What are you doing, pretending we're on such good terms?_

"You don't have to thank me," he whispered into my ear once we were sure we could at least murmur a conversation. But I ignored his proposal of friendship anyways.

"…Don't call me Akira-_chan_…" It sounded almost like a question. What had happened to the monotonous, repeating cycle that was my life? I _always_ knew what I was supposed to do, what rules to follow.

_And I still do._

"You'll be fine." My eyes darted to his placid expression.

"Wha-what do you mean?"

_Damn it, I stuttered._

"Well, you seem kind of worried, so I thought if I started this really long, boring, completely useless, somewhat friendly, a little apathetic, monotonous, off-topic, love declaration, it might help you get your mind off of things. Oh, by the way, I love you." I stopped in my tracks. He stared at my face with a completely serious look about him. I opened my mouth to try to say something, but my throat constricted, and I knew I wouldn't be able to say anything. Then he burst out laughing.

"Oh-oh my god, you should have seen your face! That was priceless!" My face heated up, whether from anger or embarrassment; I didn't particularly care at the time. But I did know what I should have – and did – done. It was the most obvious reaction toward anyone who would have done that to a girl. It was pure instinct. I had never been so irritated or annoyed – _angry_ – previous to that day. And so it was only justifiable I didn't know anger could amplify my strength so much. So I slapped him. It was quiet, and so I knew it was painful. Loud injuries meant only slight sting or shock, and pain to both. But hard, quiet wounds meant a mark had been left upon the victim. I'm sure even relatively short nails like mine would have been painful. The only problem was…

I could see how the blood had gathered to that area to try and help it.

"Ah! We have to get you and ice pack! I'm so sorry! Come on, I always keep my room cold…" I dragged him up to my room, somehow managing to avoid the gaze of my strict headmistress and father. I motioned for him to sit on my bed as I went into my bathroom to grab the medical supplies. I frantically searched for the bandages I kept and rummaged through the cabinet. Rushing back to Shindo, who was cradling his cheek, I knelt down and ran my fingers across the wound, noticing when he flinched and relaxed.

"Okay, I think I've isolated the area. I'll put some cooling gel on it and attach a bandage." I stood up to finish the procedures when I noticed Shindo rubbing his neck.

_Of course._

"Ah, your neck. Here, I'll put a hot pack on the back of your neck. It should help."

"N-no, it's fine! It'll be better in an hour!"

"No, it won't. I've had sores before; they don't heal as easily as you think." I stood over him when I noticed a long, shallow, raw wound running down his upper to middle back.

Crash! Boom!

"_Akira-nii! Akira-nii, please, wake up!" He only lay motionless in my arms, though I could still feel him breathing. I hugged him, but I felt blood running down his back. A large slash, most likely from the glass shard he had protected me from, plainly revealed itself on his back._

"_No! No, Akira-nii, please talk to me!"_

"Take off your shirt, we need to bandage that properly," I ordered in a monotone. Shindo was about to protest, but I sent him a glare that read '_Don't argue'_.

"You're unexpectedly feminine at some times, Akira-chan."

"I thought I told you to stop calling me so familiarly."

"Ah, right." I briefly wondered where he could have acquired such a wound…Perhaps not briefly. More like I was obsessing over it for a few seconds (if that can be called an obsession) until I finally voiced my curiosity.

"Oh, it's nothing…it's just that last week, I had to run through some trees and very sharp plants. One of the branches got me." So it was my fault. _Some trees_…bullshit. I still had scratches from blindly running through that small grove of trees. I knew from experience how painful all the pokes and scrapes were. I wasn't idiotic enough to continue the conversation, though.

I muttered a quiet "Oh, I see…" before falling silent.

The shattered glass was iridescent in the pale moonlight. Portions of the destroyed walls were splattered with the sacrificial blood of something. Around me, the scent of death engulfed what was once clean air. I shifted my weight when a startlingly cold liquid lapped at my bare feet. Turning my head, I looked to my right to see small ripples wet the sand on the shore, where I was standing.

_Not the sea._ My thought came out of my mouth in a faraway whisper, as if it they were not my words. Feeling as if my eyes were glazing over, I stared at the center of the lake (I assumed so) where a small patch of land floated. I almost screamed.

Covering, no, _infecting_ the makeshift island were hundreds of mirrors, all shaped differently, some double-sided, some almost clear. They surrounded only one person – the only other thing on the island. A girl clothed in nothing but a gently flowing white summer dress that gave off an almost ethereal glow. Her hair flowed freely in a slight breeze I had not noticed earlier. She stood in front of her reflection. But what stared back at her was different. In the mirror, a deep cut on her upper arm, blood still pouring onto the limb, was shown. With one fluid, light motion, the girl touched the image and the mirror shattered without a sound. The cut was inflicted upon her.

The process was repeated five more times, each shattered mirror leaving a scar upon the once flawless skin. She approached a large, full-body length mirror. Reflected upon the surface was a knife protruding out of her chest. Blood leaked out of her mouth. She raised her hand slowly.

_No, no! Please, don't!_

But my pleas were completely silent in a soundless world. And as the mirror shattered, the girl crumpled to the ground, and I stared from the shore with horror as I saw my own form fall, lifeless.


End file.
